“B” is for Bully

I’m sure we all remember a time when a grade-school bully made the life of one poor kid a regular nightmare. Usually a boy, often with his gang of thugs, targeted a smaller, more awkward child, whose frail and helpless demeanour made him easy prey ­for the bully to intimidate, humiliate, degrade and generally torment, any time, for any reason.

This scenario, of bullying amongst children, is one we are familiar with unfortunately.

However, did you know that workplace bullying is a widespread global phenomenon? While I am familiar enough with discrimination and harassment in the workplace, I wasn’t aware that workplace bullying was a serious global problem as well. Why? Because we think of bullying in terms of the example above; as an issue that only affects children. We typically have a hard time imagining one adult having that kind of power over another adult, in a workplace situation. Furthermore, there must be laws prohibiting this kind of behaviour. After all, there are laws protecting workers from racial discrimination and sexual harassment on the job, yet despite the fact bullying is four times more prevalent, it is NOT illegal in any of the 50 U.S. states and many other countries around the world.

Workplace bullying is the repeated unjust actions of an employee [or employees], directed towards another employee [or employees], which are intended to intimidate, humiliate, threaten, torment, and generally dominate that individual to the point of jeopardizing his or her health, safety, sanity and job. It usually involves some type of exploitation, manipulation and insults [including name-calling and swearing] of the target. The bully might also hinder or obstruct the target from getting work done.

Bullies are so successful because they create an atmosphere of fear, anxiety, isolation and unrelenting psychological stress, around their victim. Day after day, you are constantly criticized, blamed without facts, excluded and treated differently than everyone else. You are sweared at, humiliated in front of your peers, micro-managed and given deadlines that are unrealistic. Often times, projects you’re working on, or other materials mysteriously disappear off your desk, making you look unorganized, and in the most serious cases, figures and facts will be changed on your reports, making you appear totally incompetent.

Yet you’re not, and it’s very likely you were targeted because you are smart and pose a threat [real or perceived] to the bully. Studies even confirmed that most targets had better skills, both social and technical than the bully.

Another important fact is that 72% of the bullying is done by managers/supervisors. Therefore most complaints fall on deaf ears, as those higher up are more likely to side with one of their own. Even co-workers start pulling away from the target, and eventually side with the bully. People who weren’t just coworkers, but friends, might suddenly turn on you and become your enemy. Why? Fear — they don’t want to become the next target.

Most people think bullying is the same thing as harassment, and harassment is illegal, so bullying must be too. Think again. While bullying could include harassment, bullying by itself is NOT illegal.

Workplace harassment is discriminatory, offensive conduct, [including sexual] which causes a hostile work environment. Sounds like bullying to me! However, typically there are civil rights laws in place to defend workers from this kind of conduct only if you are a member of a protected class. Protected classes in employment could be for race/color, creed, [religion] national origin, sex, marital status, disability and sexual orientation. For instance, if an employee tells a racist joke, refers to a coworker by using racial slurs, and is told to stop, but doesn’t, this could be considered harassment. A male manager making unwelcomed sexual advances toward a female subordinate, and threatening her job if she doesn’t comply, is a case of harassment.

When harassment or discrimination is reported, the target isn’t retaliated against, etc. and the complaint is taken seriously. Bullying is concealed more, done behind closed doors, and much more cunning and shrewd.

Workplace bullying takes place all over the world. Monster.com took a survey and approximately 2/3 of those who responded admitted to being the target of some form of bullying. The survey showed the likelihood of being bullied at work varied by region and culture. In Europe a shocking 83% claimed either mental or physical bullying. Surveys conducted in the United States indicated 65% of the population had experienced workplace bullying. Asia had the least amount of it, but still 45% of workers claimed they had been bullied at work. Belgium was the country with the least amount of workplace bullying, at 38%, with China coming in second at 40%. ChinaHR (a professional recruitment website in China) commented that cultural differences may be a factor in their low percentage of workplace bullying, as the Chinese culture is more unpretentious and humble than in Europe and America.

In general, victims of workplace bullying are affected in many negative ways, including: post-tramatic stress disorder (PTSD), chronic fatigue, migranes, financially (because of frequent absence from work), low self-esteem, phobias, high blood pressure, feelings of shame, always anxious, and “on the edge,” trouble sleeping, depression, family problems, just to name a few.

There are actions that can be taken, by both employee and employer to combat bullying. Employees must recognize that they are being bullied, and know they didn’t cause it. Keep a detailed account of ever instance of the bullying, such as date, time, place and nature of the bullying. Make sure you keep any documents, such as emails or even text messages that may contain some disparaging comment, etc. Also, keep hidden back-ups and hard copies of all work documents produced, reviews, etc. to protect yourself in case the bully tries to change or alter documents. Understand that managers and HR are not going to advocate for you, so try to find one person you can trust to corroborate incidents and situations of bullying that are witnessed.

Companies must encourage a healthy culture. Managers and top executives should set good examples and have respect for employees. Employers must create a zero tolerance policy against bullying, that should be part of their code of conduct. Reports of bullying should be addressed immediately and taken seriously. Hold awareness meetings to discuss the subject of bullying. Provide a phone number victims can call, anonomously, just to have someone to talk to. Provide onsite counsellors, if necessary. If bullying is running rampant in the company, you may need to resort to hiring security people and cameras to ensure a safe environment for all.

Workplace bullying is a serious issue that affects everyone. The employees suffer and the business suffers. However, in the end, it should be the bully who suffers most of all.

 

Sources & References: Monster Global Survey: Workplace bullying is a common problem worldwide; Namie, D. G. (2011). Being Bullied? Start Here (Workplace Bullying Institute); Workplace Bullying and Disruptive Behavior: What Everyone Needs to Know (Washington State Department of Labor & Industries)

4 Replies to ““B” is for Bully”

  1. Does this bullying also impacts the job search in another
    company?

    As we all know that all company HR do internal reference
    checks before deciding on a candidate for any job position. Generally before
    closing on a candidate, HR of a company checks with the HR of the candidate’s
    company. And HR always have links all around.

    Do bullying victims face trouble in getting through the
    selection process of another job position because of these internal reference
    checks by HR?

    With my experience I can say that YES the bullying
    victims face a lot of trouble getting through the selection process of any job
    position. Due to the negative feedback from internal reference checks by HR,
    they are lesser preferred over other candidates.

    In my job search (both in my previous company and the current
    company), I have often experienced that in spite of ALL my effort, repeated follow-up,
    interest in the job opening, perfect fit for the role, being a victim to the
    bullying culture does make the selection chances very lesser.

    How to leave this place when there is NO other job offer
    in hand?

    I am really tired of trying. In spite of ALL my
    credentials, certifications, education, all what matters is that I have
    suffered at the hands of the bullies. How to get out of this trap?

    I am sure that there are many others who would have faced
    similar situation in their careers. If you are reading this, then please share
    with me your experience. How did you come out of it? What different did you
    try? Your ideas, suggestions could do wonders for me.

  2. Workplace (in IT) Bullying that I have faced in
    Singapore since 2007

    I am an IT Professional and this is my true story.

    In 2007, when I was working in my previous IT Company, I
    came from India to work for one of their public sector projects in Singapore. During
    the initial settling phase itself, the new guys were bullied by the project managers (all Singaporean PRs) to prove their own worth (many of these managers
    had prior experience with similar public sector projects in Singapore). Since
    it was my first onsite trip, I somehow adjusted to the situation. Unfortunately
    at that same time I faced certain health issues, had a surgery also (took a
    couple of weeks off).

    After sometime, my program manager (like senior manager)
    asked me a favour by working overtime for another assignment in another
    project. This senior manager was extremely bossy and known for being hard. I
    thought that this was a good chance to prove myself in his eyes. So I accepted
    and started working even harder to fulfil the tasks in both projects (my role
    at that time was of a senior developer). Fortunately I started enjoying my time
    in this other project, due to some appreciation by colleagues and managers in
    that project. And finally it ended up with a positive feedback.

    Then came the annual appraisal in the mid of 2008. This
    senior/program manager recommended me for a promotion in the initial phase of
    the appraisal process. And this was in spite of the negative feedback (not so
    good) of my immediate project manager (who disliked me). Then came the final
    phase of the appraisal process which was decided by the senior/middle
    management based on vertical and company profits. It was during this time that
    my immediate project manager became a real bully.

    He passed a lot of underline comments, sometimes became
    abusive, and tried his best to undermine all my hard work. He behaved as if my
    tasks counted for nothing, and could not be achieved without his inputs (none
    of which he actually ever gave). Every time he tried to keep me out of the loop
    including those discussions/meetings which directly related to my tasks.
    Eventually this frustrated me and I discussed this with my colleagues (many of
    them were facing similar heat from this manager directly or indirectly). But
    none of them raised voice because it was appraisal time and everyone wanted to
    play safe.

    Finally because of his negative and biased behaviour, my
    appraisal was screwed (an average rating). The senior manager blamed this on me
    because I discussed about what was happening with the fellow colleagues. After
    that I started searching for another job in Singapore, but nothing worked
    (being on Employment Pass was also a factor).

    Then in early 2009, the chairman of this previous company
    got involved in a huge scam. The company was in a lot of trouble and it was
    hell (sleepless nights). Everyone (from the bottom to the top) in the company
    was afraid of losing their jobs and were just appeasing their bosses. I took it
    as an opportunity to pursue some certifications and credentials, hoping that it
    may help find another job quickly. In next few months, I completed one
    technical certification and one project management credential (PMP). Everyone
    thought that I will definitely leave now because I may get a good job, and
    hence things (bullying) improved a bit.

    Unfortunately I did not get any job offer, and eventually
    in early 2010 my program manager (he was a new one, the earlier one was thrown
    out by the company in mid of 2009) asked me to contribute more by working
    overtime for another assignment in other project (and this was completely off
    the record). Once again I agreed hoping that it would be a learning phase. But
    it turned out to be another nightmare. That project was the worst I ever
    imagined (a horrible mess). Till today I do not understand why the client (a
    Singapore public sector company) did not sue them. Eventually I had to say no
    to that project’s leadership and come out of it. Now this senior manager used
    this as a negative point against me. He even criticized me for my work,
    overlooking all the hard work that I had put in. Before that I thought that
    this guy was cool, but then I understood what others said about him was true.

    Then came the appraisal process of 2010, it was during
    this time that this senior manager asked to do a huge task all alone without a
    team, and the timeline given was totally impractical (it was virtually
    impossible). In spite of all my effort and hard work, my appraisal was
    completely screwed (this was the worst in my career). The sole reason was that
    this management wanted some scapegoats because the project’s contract extension
    was almost denied by the client (they had already put up a tender). That was
    the first time I felt that I did a mistake by coming in this IT industry. Maybe
    I am too simple a person for such cheap/unprofessional politics & tactics.

    Finally by god’s grace, that horrible project was taken
    away by the client in the end of 2010. And then the company asked everyone in
    the project team to either leave (for Singaporeans) or go back to offshore (where
    at that time, the situation was worse and the future was insecure). It was
    during that time that I got a job offer (a permanent one) from my present
    company (a reputed IT company based out of Singapore). So I resigned and then
    joined my present company in early 2011.

    Here I enjoyed the first 2 days of the company’s induction
    program. After that I had to meet my supervisor who happened to be one of the
    directors (by designation). I will never forget my first meeting with that classy
    lady. She was not only demoralizing but abusive also (trust me on this). It was
    my third/fourth day in the company. You can imagine my pain. How can someone
    join under such a person? I simply did not understand that if the directors
    feel so uncomfortable talking to people at my level (a project lead), then why should
    we directly report to them. Can they not create a hierarchy to streamline the
    process and the person of contact?

    After that I met my project manager who initially
    happened to be nice but was completely out of control of his team. He was even
    bullied by them. That made things worse for me also. The colleagues with whom I
    had to initially liaise for my tasks simply took advantage of this manager and he
    slowly started losing faith in me. This is the first company I have seen where the
    concerned people do not share the necessary stuff also for the other person to
    work (and the managers do not intervene at all).

    Here most of the project managers are sitting ducks. Some
    of them even prefer doing the low level tasks on their own just to avoid their
    team bullies (not because they wanted it). When these project managers are not
    in control, then how can they make sure that a new team member gets a nice
    environment. These managers often pretend as if they are in control of their
    team and they are the ones on whose order the bullies are being bullied. In
    reality, these project managers now do not have a choice.

    This bullying culture is highly abusive in nature, and
    most of the victims are not only abused personally, but they are literally tortured
    mentally. And to add to their pain, this bullying is being completely backed by
    the HR and the Senior/Middle Management. Those who ignore or support this
    bullying culture are allowed to work by this management. All those who show signs
    of discomfort or talk against this bullying culture are made bullying victims
    immediately.

    And above all, this Director, her Vice President (whom
    she reports) and other Senior Management people (who are sitting close to their
    large teams) simply ignore whatever is happening. It appears as if they are
    enjoying all this. I am working here since last 15 months, and I still do not
    understand how this bullying (highly abusive) culture satisfies the goals from
    the senior management’s perspective.

    This company certainly has the worst HR department
    possible. Here only the management dictates terms. And to add to the dismay,
    some of the HR people themselves are being bullied badly by the foot lickers of
    this Senior Management. Seeing all this, how can someone approach these HR guys
    for help and on what basis (when they are themselves ignorant of this bullying
    culture)?

    Honestly like me there are many more victims in this
    company. I feel more upset when I see them giving in to this bullying culture. What
    should I do? How to report this and to whom (and what would be the consequences
    thereafter)? Is there any LAW (employment/criminal) against such targeted
    bullying in Singapore? Or is this the true face of today’s job industry in
    Singapore?

    Please suggest something practical and effective.

    1. I have even complained to MOM for the same. According to
      them there is no legislation on workplace bullying in Singapore. The Employment Act, which the Ministry of Manpower administers, could only inquire into disputes between an employee and employer arising from the contract of service between the two parties or from the provisions of the Act. The Ministry has no jurisdiction to intervene in any “personal dispute”, verbal abuses, management style/ lack of
      professionalism on the part of the employer or among colleagues.

      1. One more strange aspect to
        this bullying culture is the use of SPY GADGETS by the team members (either
        guys or gals) to get some proof against the rival team/member. The use of spy
        gadgets is a common trend in this company. These gadgets are mostly used by the
        long-serving employees of this company.

        Generally in a team, at
        the least one person definitely owns some sort of a spy gadget. Their strategy
        is to FIRST BULLY (to ANY extent possible, be it personal or abusive, you just
        cannot imagine) the rival team/person and EXCITE them to REACT/SAY something
        offensive/ridiculous. Then they RECORD this rival’s voice/video (ONLY WHEN the bullied
        team/person reacts) and present this to the senior people (managers/senior leads)
        and complain about the wrong behaviour of the rival team/member. Most of the
        managers are aware of this and they don’t care. But this tactic also works like
        a sort of blackmailing the rival team/member by telling them indirectly (by
        getting this information passed through someone else) so that they do not complain
        as they themselves may get in trouble.

        I am sure that most of
        these bullies are aware that there is NO legislation in Singapore for bullying
        (verbal abuses or inappropriate behaviour) and hence the only defence has to be
        from the Civil/Criminal Law. That is the reason every team/member is desperate
        to have these recordings to save from any legal action/consequence.

        Most of the new employees
        in this company are black-mailed using this bullying tactic. First they are
        bullied in a very bad way (abusive/personal, you cannot imagine), and then
        eventually their REACTION gets recorded by someone (generally the rival group
        of the team he/she has joined). Thereafter they are blackmailed for doing
        whatever the rival team/member wants, be it bullying someone else or working
        against their own team, could be anything. These senior employees threaten for any
        LEGAL consequence (in case someone complains, then their recording might also
        be used).

        And as I told earlier
        also, the HR, the Senior Management are aware of everything, yet they are
        completely ignorant. Many people have tried to complain in the past but none of
        them has got any support/justice from either the HR or the Senior Management.

        Even the Ministry of Manpower
        cannot do anything in this? Please tell how to get out of this messy situation.

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